What I've Learned as a College Freshman

Yes, I'm a 35 year old college freshman. I have survived my first 6 weeks of school. With midterms upon me, I am looking back at the things I have learned in those 6 weeks from my fellow classmen that are a generation or two behind me.

I've learned that if you're in the age range of 18-25 you don't really need to show up for class because you are already smarter than the teacher. The only days you need to show up are really test days, because evidently at that age you know more than them and they are not going to have anything important to say that you didn't already know.

I've learned that if you have a teacher that wears hearing aids, you sit at the back of the class and make fun of them or talk about your upcoming weekend camping trip and the new tent that you bought in low tones so that the teacher can't make out what you're really saying. You also make fun of the teacher because he doesn't understand what someone says and it makes you look REALLY cool to all the people that sit on the back row with you when you tell him the wrong answer but he thinks you're right and then you blurt out, "It didn't matter he can't hear anyway."

I've learned that if you study real hard and answer questions in class, someone who evidently didn't read and prepare for the chapter and doesn't participate in the class discussion, will inevitably make rude comments because the old, person in the first row always answers the teachers questions. And evidently if that old person, who happens to be between 35 and 40, feels the need to ask a question that they don't understand they have some sort of problem because they are prolonging class.

I've learned that it doesn't matter if you study for tests. It's okay to take the same class four times. And I've learned that you don't want to do ALL the algebra homework because that would be boring.

I've learned that evidently once you hit the ripe old age of 25, you don't have a life anymore. I've also learned that evidently if you make good grades it's because you don't have a life and all you do is study.

I've learned that it's okay to disrespect people. "What are they going to do about it?"

I've learned that my grandma evidently raised me wrong because who says you should be respectful to teachers and the elderly. Why should anyone use "Please", "Thank You", "Excuse Me" or any other such niceties.

I've learned that it's okay to talk back to your teachers. Hey, they wouldn't have a job if you weren't there. (Because evidently if you're the one being pissy to the teacher, you are the ONLY one that matters.)

I've learned that cheating on tests is okay. Using your cell phone in class is okay. Texting the whole time you're in class is okay. (Remember, the teacher has nothing important to say anyway.) It's okay to lie to the teacher when they tell you to quit texting in class. That your fiance sending you pictures of shoes is more important than any lecture and is considered an EMERGENCY because you don't want them wearing Doc Martins with a tux on YOUR wedding day.

I've learned that Algebra is stupid. Because where are you ever going to use this crap again?

I've learned it's okay to leave class early if it's nice outside because you have shopping to do.

I've learned that it's easier to just take the simple way out and do the bare minimum because if you do more than that, than heaven help us, the teacher will start expecting it.

I won't bore anybody with what I have learned that I will actually use in life. I won't tell you that I think some of the kids will never make it in the so called REAL world. I won't tell you that I work hard to achieve what I do on the tests and that I spend every spare minute studying. I won't tell you that I'm looking forward to seeing my first play next week. I won't tell you that I would like to stand up in my Psychology class and give the little asses in the back row a piece of my mind because they sit and make fun of a good teacher. And that some of us, actually have to pay for the education we receive and would like to get the most out of that. I won't tell you that I actually read and prepare for lectures.

I won't tell you that I've learned that my English teacher is madly in love with her husband. Loves her kiddos dearly. Likes to bake, crochet and knit. But denies that she is domestic.

I won't tell you that my Psych teacher likes to do woodworking. That he was a counselor. That the reason he has hearing aids was because he had numerous ear infections as a young child and they didn't put tubes in your ears back then because they did not have the technology.

I won't tell you that my Algebra teacher set on the back row of her class in math and thought she was cool. She was going to be a drama major but instead moved from the back row up to the front where the boy that asked all the questions of the professor became her husband. I won't tell you that my Anatomy teacher has a four year old grandson and a daughter that can't eat fresh vegetables. I've learned he is a history buff, excels in all sciences, was a high school teacher for many years before coming here, and was in love with a girl named Leslie that was his neighbor, a senior when he was a freshman and that she walked on the front line in the high school marching band.

I've learned more in 6 weeks than I ever thought I would and THANK GOD, I'm learning it from a group of teachers that actually care about the kids in their classes and the education they are giving them.