Hmmmm....

Every once in a while you have to set back and just....hmmmm....a situation. I have a friend that is in quite a pickle. I've watched him allow himself to get in this pickle over the years. See, he has a heart of gold. It's not just gold plated it's solid. He'd do anything for someone he cares about and that's why he's in this pickle. I guess that's the difference between us, I would have to look at the long term and weigh the consequences, he just acts in the moment and does.

He's always been there when I've been going through a rough patch and he's tried to make me see the other side of things when I had blinders on and only wanted to look at it from my standpoint. So I just want him to know I'm there for him. I think he knows that.

My friend is in a new relationship, which I hope is everything he wants and more because he deserves that. She seems like a pretty good girl from what I've seen of her. I've only seen her twice and I don't have anything bad to say about her. I'm a pretty good judge of character and I usually draw a conclusion about somebody from the first time I meet them. I don't know if that's fair to people but I seem to be pretty good at knowing if somebody is fake or not. I'm definitely one that is not going to pretent to like someone. If I don't like you, you'll know it. I'm just that way.

The deal with my friend is, he has assumed the role as "caretaker". Up until now, he just went with the flow. The job he has keeps him out on the road. He has never had a reason to come home so he has never really asked a lot to be home. Well, now he has a reason and him coming home falls on deaf ears. My husband worked for the same company for a while but he let them know they wouldn't push him around and keep him out. He's kind of "strange" that way...you know, his family is more important than a job. Well, I know for a fact that the people at this company go home when they have something they want to do and they leave work in the middle of the afternoon if there is something they want to do and it don't matter if 1 or 20 trucks are waiting to get a load. Now lets think about this...would you go home and say to your drivers, "To bad, I have something I want to do and you'll just have to wait til tomorrow and see what I can find."? I dispatched for a while. I couldn't even make my own husband happy let alone a fleet. Truck drivers are "hard to get along with", whiney individuals. Most of them love drama. I think they live for it.

Oh, wait!!! I'm totally getting off of the subject, truckdrivers is a whole other post that I could go on a rant for days about.

Back to my story...

Anyway....because this friend has never really wanted to come home and they know he will not fight back, they are pushing him around and he has been out since Valentine's. That sucks. He didn't even get to spend Valentine's with his new sweetie!!! At this point, it doesn't look like they are trying to get him home this weekend either. And from the last I heard, they are only trying to make it a trip through the house maybe next Monday. Now tell me, if she has a regular job when the hell are they supposed to see each other? So this really pisses me off because I don't like to see nice people that work their ass off get stepped on.

Then you have my friends family. They are a good family. The parents are nice enough. I always thought the dad was a little bit of a dead beat though. I don't know the whole story...it's just my opinion. See, he lets my friend basically support him and his wife. His wife works. He don't. My friend took over the mortgage on the house and makes the house payment, the parents live there. My friend basically supplies them with a vehicle to drive. And when they go on trips they use his credit card to charge on. He don't know what to do about this and his once immaculate credit rating is now ruined. They keep one credit card totally maxed and the tell him, "We're doing the best we can. We pay the minimum." I know that is what most Americans do...Pay the minimum. But lets all get real here. They are never in their lifetime going to pay off the credit card. So who's going to get stuck with this maxed out card. BINGO...my friend.

My friend also has a younger brother that seems to think that his brother should pay for everything for him and co sign for everything for him. And once again, we see that credit rating taking a plummet. His brother got into financial problems and was trying to rob Peter to pay Paul and was using the check cashing thing but oops...he wrote a few checks that he couldn't cover. Who paid him out? Yes, that's right. The brother needed a new car but couldn't get financed? Who co signed for him? Yes, you're right again. He needed to lease an apartment and needed the money plus a co signer, guess who he called? Kudos to you. You're right again. The parents needed a new vehicle? Who co signed? Gosh, you're good at this.

Do you see where this is all going? Well, he asked for my opinion last night. Let's just say when it comes to these matters I have never been the one to be politically correct. I shoot from the hip and if you don't like it you shouldn't have asked. I apologized this morning to him and then went on for another five minutes about what he should do.

I understand trying to help your parents. I'm sure when I get my degree and get my job, if I'm able I will. BUT, I'm an only child. He has TWO brothers. In my eyes, I think they should share the burden. Why should my friend suffer the whole financial burden on his own? The brother, well, I think he just needs to freaking GROW UP!!! Quit living the whole, "Look at me, I'm a bachelor and I live in KC and I go out all the time." He has a flipping college degree let's find a job that it's for and WORK!!!! Give up that nightlife!

OHHHHH...did I say, he also wrecked the car that my friend ended up paying half the payments on and then wasn't going to let him have any of the insurance check PLUS he now has my friends pickup and he doesn't have a vehicle when he comes home now. The only vehicle that he has to drive is his semi or his parents car.

This whole situation has me on this roller coaster. I love my friend dearly and I hate it that he's experiencing it. When I think about the whole thing, I want to shake my friend but at the same time I just have to set back and go....HMMMM.